my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize