Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point