We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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