Texts From Last Night

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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..

  (1-605): View more from South Dakota

  Both

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  (605): white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup.. (1-605): Both http://tfl.nu/cq4l
  Replies (18) Good night (1898) Bad night (557)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.

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  (203): Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess. http://tfl.nu/gcqa
  Replies (24) Good night (540) Bad night (2610) Order T-Shirt
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  (438): View more from Quebec

  I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.

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  (438): I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures. http://tfl.nu/qhtl
  Replies (17) Good night (3031) Bad night (683) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...

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  (603): the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing... http://tfl.nu/ohtd
  Replies (61) Good night (493) Bad night (4176) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive

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  (609): imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive http://tfl.nu/r061
  Replies (50) Good night (4044) Bad night (938) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together

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  (630): i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together http://tfl.nu/1hrq
  Replies (36) Good night (5953) Bad night (1589) Order T-Shirt
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.

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  (920): the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet. http://tfl.nu/lvr3
  Replies (12) Good night (5756) Bad night (815)
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  (731): View more from Tennessee

  i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview

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  (731): i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview http://tfl.nu/woj8
  Replies (22) Good night (3864) Bad night (1193) Order T-Shirt
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere

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  (989): there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere http://tfl.nu/hg2l
  Replies (12) Good night (1099) Bad night (2769) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA

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  (253): drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA http://tfl.nu/xnrm
  Replies (6) Good night (775) Bad night (1944) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.

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  (619): By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time. http://tfl.nu/je0g
  Replies (14) Good night (2395) Bad night (789) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.

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  (480): You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home. (602): Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul. http://tfl.nu/qvbw
  Replies (10) Good night (2632) Bad night (627)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.

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  (508): I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking. http://tfl.nu/mdga
  Replies (16) Good night (1967) Bad night (554) Order T-Shirt
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  (585): View more from New York

  javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks

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  (585): javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks http://tfl.nu/0lfa
  Replies (7) Good night (1011) Bad night (1024) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus

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  (510): I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus http://tfl.nu/am4v
  Replies (5) Good night (402) Bad night (165) Order T-Shirt

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