just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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