I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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