Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
