Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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