She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
