then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
