I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
