Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize
