i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
