My nipple is on Facebook.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
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