I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Randomize
