So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
