If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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