i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i think my mom watched the whole time
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
He better not be in your backpack
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
