As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i wish my penis had a tongue
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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