He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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