Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
