first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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