Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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