I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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