it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize