spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
