party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Randomize
