elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
please don't ironically join a cult
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