I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
wow bdsm is so cute
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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