You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
