I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
