My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Randomize
