i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize