This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize