No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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