The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
