she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
