she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize