If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
