he thought i was a dude.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
