Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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