I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
