in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize