11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
