i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
