I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
