I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Randomize
