i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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