OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
if only i could text you this smell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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