he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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